{"id":342,"date":"2010-02-19T01:00:14","date_gmt":"2010-02-19T06:00:14","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/jmusportsblog.com\/?p=342"},"modified":"2010-02-19T07:29:45","modified_gmt":"2010-02-19T12:29:45","slug":"can-snooki-outdraw-the-dukes","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/jmusportsblog.com\/?p=342","title":{"rendered":"Will Snooki Outdraw the Dukes?"},"content":{"rendered":"
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So has it really come to this? Not only is JMU trying to bring Jersey Shore’s\u00a0 Snooki to campus<\/a>, but as of the time I write this there are over 2,600 people who have already RSVP’d to the event on Facebook. And UPB hasn’t even finalized the date yet. Wow! If any random 21 year old can become famous nowadays simply for being the sloppy drunk who strikes out with every member of the opposite sex in the bar, then I really was born about a decade too early. Forget a reality tv show, there might be a network dedicated to me. That’s not really the point though. The point is that if these numbers are true, then it’s quite possible that Snooki’s appearance will draw more students than the average Dukes’ hoops game. I know this has been a disappointing season, but you’d think people would want to go to games even if it were for no other reason than to see Denzel Bowles play.<\/p>\n

So basically it comes down to if students would rather listen to Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi or watch Denzel play basketball. It seems like a no-brainer to me, but let’s break it down just for fun.<\/p>\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n
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DENZEL<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n

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SNOOKI<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n

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Size<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n

6\u201910\u201d, 255 lbs<\/td>\n\n

Self-desribed as \u201cpint sized\u201d. Um, sure.<\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n

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Likes to Thrown Down<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n

Dunks<\/td>\n\n

Jager shots<\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n

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About one year from now<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n

He\u2019ll be CAA player of the year<\/td>\n\n

She\u2019ll be forgotten<\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n

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Tough to deny<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n

The offensive talent<\/td>\n\n

The trainwreck appeal<\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n

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Rolls with<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n

Julius, Ben, Trevon, Darren<\/td>\n\n

Jwoww, The Situation, Pauly D, that other dude<\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n

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Critics say<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n

He\u2019s got to improve his defense<\/td>\n\n

She\u2019s \u201can embarrassment to the human race<\/a>\u201d<\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n

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Fans want to see<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n

Him lead the Dukes back to prominence<\/td>\n\n

Her get drunk and fall down<\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n

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Breakthrough moment<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n

37 and 15 in his second game as a Duke<\/td>\n\n

Getting punched in the face<\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n

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Personal Kryptonite<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n

Gets into foul trouble<\/td>\n\n

Rather stupid<\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n

Basically, in one corner we’ve got Denzel, a 6’10” beast of a basketball power who could finish as one of top Dukes ever. On the other hand, we’ve got a random drunk chick who isn’t even Italian<\/a> with no\u00a0discernible\u00a0talent. I know who’d I’d rather go see, but apparently 26 hundred students are already itching to go see Snooki. Maybe it’s just another sign that I’m old (highly likely, I’m about a year away from flat out being scared of college kids and their loud music), but maybe it’s a sign that this hoops team is really struggling. <\/span><\/p>\n