Feb 19 / Rob

Will Snooki Outdraw the Dukes?

So has it really come to this? Not only is JMU trying to bring Jersey Shore’s  Snooki to campus, but as of the time I write this there are over 2,600 people who have already RSVP’d to the event on Facebook. And UPB hasn’t even finalized the date yet. Wow! If any random 21 year old can become famous nowadays simply for being the sloppy drunk who strikes out with every member of the opposite sex in the bar, then I really was born about a decade too early. Forget a reality tv show, there might be a network dedicated to me. That’s not really the point though. The point is that if these numbers are true, then it’s quite possible that Snooki’s appearance will draw more students than the average Dukes’ hoops game. I know this has been a disappointing season, but you’d think people would want to go to games even if it were for no other reason than to see Denzel Bowles play.

So basically it comes down to if students would rather listen to Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi or watch Denzel play basketball. It seems like a no-brainer to me, but let’s break it down just for fun.

DENZEL

SNOOKI

Size

6’10”, 255 lbs

Self-desribed as “pint sized”. Um, sure.

Likes to Thrown Down

Dunks

Jager shots

About one year from now

He’ll be CAA player of the year

She’ll be forgotten

Tough to deny

The offensive talent

The trainwreck appeal

Rolls with

Julius, Ben, Trevon, Darren

Jwoww, The Situation, Pauly D, that other dude

Critics say

He’s got to improve his defense

She’s “an embarrassment to the human race

Fans want to see

Him lead the Dukes back to prominence

Her get drunk and fall down

Breakthrough moment

37 and 15 in his second game as a Duke

Getting punched in the face

Personal Kryptonite

Gets into foul trouble

Rather stupid

Basically, in one corner we’ve got Denzel, a 6’10” beast of a basketball power who could finish as one of top Dukes ever. On the other hand, we’ve got a random drunk chick who isn’t even Italian with no discernible talent. I know who’d I’d rather go see, but apparently 26 hundred students are already itching to go see Snooki. Maybe it’s just another sign that I’m old (highly likely, I’m about a year away from flat out being scared of college kids and their loud music), but maybe it’s a sign that this hoops team is really struggling.

4 Comments

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  1. million / Feb 19 2010

    that chick looks like Vinnie Bagodonuts in drag.

  2. Rob / Feb 19 2010

    I don’t know if you comment made me laugh because there is a certain accuracy to your statement, or if because of the thousands of nicknames that C-Note has, you chose my favorite one.

  3. VA / Feb 25 2010

    I think this was a wonderful blog about Miss Snooki… What is it with the show that people like? Personally I think it is a disgrace to the US that we have that show on air and even more of a disgrace that people ACTUALLY watch it… I think morbid curiosity could be it… I’ve never been that curious. What’s it that they say? Curiosity killed the cat???

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